Homo Scavenger spots discarded Danish chair from a distance of 1 & 1/2 blocks...

The homosexual sapien is widely held to possess a unique ability to identify items of high quality and fine design, items valued but often less quickly and accurately identified by the rest of the species. This capacity likely evolved as a consequence of the increase in reproductive fitness it conferred on the homosexual, allowing him to establish a niche in which he is tolerated and appreciated for his contribution to the appearance and lifestyle of the more numerous heterosexual type, much as the disposition towards altruism is believed to have evolved. Whether it is a heightened perceptiveness for such features as color and texture - the so-called "queer eye" - has yet to be scientifically confirmed, however studdies on rats offer preliminary support for the hypothesis. Although the inversion remains a controversial explanation of homosexuality, it has been proposed that the practice of "antiquing" in the homosexual male may result from residual expression of the ancestral female gatherering role.

I've been so concerned about plumbing, roofing, sanding the floors, that I haven't had much time to exercise my more rare lesbian queer eye lately. Its Sunday and you can't get anything done unless its at the emergency rate, so I was pretty excited this afternoon when I spotted this chair languishing out on the street. I was eager for a small project and some quick satisfaction as my dream renovation drags into its fifth month. Its not a gorgeous chair... I thought maybe someone had lifted it from a public library, but I liked the squared arms and the overall shape and decided to drag it in. Before I even thought to take a picture of it I started in on the dirty upholstery. With the current urban bedbug crisis plagueing even featured house tours on apartmenttherapy I wanted it off and out of my house right away, but I took the time to have it inspected by an expert first. With his approval I carried on, cutting away the wool cover to expose two nasty layers of crumbling foam, in both the seat and the chair back. Yuck!

With most of the foam out of the way, except for some bits that had partially disintegrated and stuck to the wood, I tried to figure out how the fabric was attached so as to conceal all staples or nails: so that's what piping is for. At first I thought it would be too much trouble to get it off and almost gave up on the whole thing. I turned over the chair to get a better look at the label - Rudd. Denmark/Washington D.C. I can't find much about it on the internet, it seems to be an office furniture company that may or may not still be around. Any information out there? Its not worth any great trouble but I have a soft spot for Danish furniture, it deserves a chance. A wrench with a clamp solved my problems in a heartbeat. I grabbed the piping and pulled. The upholstery came off in one long piece with most of the staples stuck in it. The rest came out easily with the wrench.

Here's my new chair after about an hour of fun. Instead of upholstery I think I will make cushions to strap or maybe snap on, much cleaner. Tomorrow I'll sand it lightly and seal it while I burn up about what I learn from the building inspector.